Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Santa Claus Conquers The Martians... What a great movie! The basic premise is a simple one -- there's something wrong with the way-too-serious kids on Mars and to fix the problem the Martian leaders decide to kidnap Santa Claus to give the Martian children a proper childhood. Of course a couple of Earth kids get caught up in the plot and get taken back to Mars. The martians split into two camps -- those who only want Santa to bring joy to the kids and those who want Santa and the Earth children dead. In the end, well to save the surprise for you, let's just say everyone ends up happy. Cheesy special effects, stumbled-over dialogue, over-the-top acting, a theme song destined to be covered over and over as a punk rock classic and Pia Zadora's first shot at horrendous acting... what more could you want? If I ever do become a famous screenwriter and thus required to sell my soul as I am sure is required by the union, this will be the movie I want to ruin with a remake!